Billionaires, AI, Tokyo, and a Doctorate

This year…

I’ve let this website run on its own for several years now, yet it seems I only post once a year on average. This is that once-a-year post. Rather than focusing on a single event, this post reflects the tapestry of moments that made up my 2024. The year feels like a blur — here, gone, a blink.

The major highlights were:

Finished my PhD(?!).
Worked at a startup in LA, ending with a stay at a billionaire’s house.
Wrapped up an internship at Sony AI in Tokyo.

I won’t unpack much of these points here, if you’re curious, reach out and I’d be glad to share. Instead, this post is about the quiet seconds of growth, the moments between the moments — the shower thoughts, sunsets, and stillness.

The narrative is going to be messy. It’s my blog post, deal with it. To make matters worse, I’ll scatter highlight images of this year throughout. I prefer it this way, a multi-narrative approach, mirroring how my mind works.

My shoes drying in the sun in a Bel Air mansion after I washed the previous night's puke off them.

The road to deeper connection - good conversations

This year, I learned that good conversations are a skill. Like any other skill, it requires practice. Deep connections begin here.

Many of us strive to project confidence and groundedness. We aim to build trust, appear approachable, and generally cultivate a calm, centered presence. To me, the end goal is clear, but path to achieving that is so unclear.

2024 had me interacting with some incredible people — ones with massive influence, others with exceptional talent, and many still finding their way, like me. Kindness was universal, but only a few left a lasting impression, the most meaningful conversations were with people who knew themselves, articulated ideas cleanly, can separate facts from opinions.

It’s one thing to recognize these qualities, but without actionable ways to apply them, they’re just abstract ideals.

Treated to a 1 Michelin star Omakase experience in LA. Thanks G! 🫶

The Blank Slate

I once believed kind words and active listening were the keys to meaningful conversations. This Blank Slate approach involved entering conversations without preconceptions, asking questions, and deeply listening.

Presenting a talk at a Tokyo AI event.

It works well — if the other person has something to unload. But when both people take this approach, conversations can become hollow, like two people waiting for the other to set the tone.

I’m not sure if this Blank Slate Approach is quite the same as active listening, but I’ve found that it doesn’t always lead to the deeper connections I expect.

The Buffet Dinner

Some say interesting people attract interesting people.

I’ve learned that being “interesting” can sometimes alienate. Unusual experiences or strong opinions intrigue others at first but can quickly create distance — what I call the Buffet Dinner effect. Great conversations are built on shared understanding, yet unique perspectives often lack common ground.

Hiking a glacier in Iceland.

So… now what?

Surprising to no one, attracting good conversation lies the intersection of being interesting and being interested. This is the tension between the Buffet Dinner and the Blank Slate. Just as unsurprisingly, this balance requires adapting to each person — reading their openness, interests, and conversational cues in real-time.

I remind myself often that conversations are like bartering : an exchange of stories, ideas, and pieces of ourselves. The goal isn’t to “win” but to create a mutually rewarding exchange. This happens with we share our thoughts at the right moments and remain open to theirs. People do want to know what we think — but only when our timing aligns with the rhythm of the conversation.

A picture of me trying to take a picture of steam in Boston. PC: Elliot Tower.

How do we sense the right moment? I’m still working on it, but I think the answer is:

Presence.

Being fully present means shelving assumptions, silencing inner monologues, and leaning into the moment with genuine curiosity. It’s not about perfection or pretense — it’s about showing up, fully engaged and open to connection. Wherever you are, be all there.

A replicated shot from the film "Kimi No Na Wa" / "Your Name" taken from the Tokyo National Arts Center.

The Destination or the Journey?

The Company. There it is, my 2024 answer to the question front and center.

Most of my life, I’ve felt like I was running. Running towards something; or maybe from something.

I’ve pushed myself relentlessly, honing my technical craft, striving to get somewhere. But this year, I’ve started to understand a hard truth: there’s no finish line that guarantees happiness; no summit where contentment waits.

This realization isn’t new — it’s the kind of thing you hear in passing and nod along to. But there’s a difference between knowing something and truly feeling its weight. That weight didn’t settle on me until late this year.

Tokyo - my favourite city by far (at the time of writing).

Maybe it’s because I’m now swimming with the sharks — extremely talented researchers known for ground-breaking work, constantly feeling like I’ll never reach their level. Or maybe it’s because I’ve drifted from the friends who defined my early adulthood. (You know who you are).

This year’s harsh reality check is that everyone in life ends up at the same destination. I spent so much time chasing a non-existent “rainbow at the end of the tunnel,” trying to make my journey colorful. I should instead have been focusing on the people who have been with me along the way — those fleeting connections that make the present more meaningful.

It wasn’t always me reaching out. Most of the time, these people came into my life, and I didn’t turn them away. I was lucky to have them around when I needed it most. But now, having lived in a place infamous for social isolation, I feel the weight of my own social limitations.

Maybe life isn’t just about reaching the top. Maybe it’s about who we become, who we allow ourselves to be, and who we share these fleeting moments with.